There are lots of reasons I could be unhappy if I put my mind to it. But joy is a state of mind, often independent of circumstances. This may sound like a cliche, but I choose to focus on the positives in life. This is a trait that I learned from my mother, who has certainly had her share of sorrows in her life, though you'd never know it.
Life is a grand adventure, and every day holds potential that we often cannot even imagine, or that we overlook as we rush from one activity or chore or demand to another.
I've had tragedy and grief and despair in my life. Now I'm over fifty, stuck in a middle aged body, and on my third marriage. I have to keep going blonder every time I get my hairs did, just to cover all the gray! But you know what - I gave myself most of these gray hairs and by jove, I've earned every one of them.
Wait a minute - this was supposed to be about why I am so happy. Well, I'll tell you.
I am happy because God can restore all we have lost, and bless us beyond our imagination - or what we "deserve" - in life and in love. I am happy because (finally) I have a husband who is also my best friend and my "boon companion" (whatever that means - it sounds cool anyway). I am happy because my middle aged body serves me very well, in spite of my past abuses. I am happy because my children are strong, independent, and brave. I am happy because my grandchildren are brilliant and perfect - of course they are.
I've been a career woman for the past twenty years, in HR, real estate, and banking. I've worked more than my fair share of 60 hour work weeks. I've juggled (and dropped) work, kids, church, volunteer work, vacations, husbands, pets, sports, cooking, cleaning, you name it - and sometimes felt like I was going insane with the demands of life in this era. I have had it all, and lost it all, and everything in between. I've been dirty poor, and affluent, and have been joyful, and sorrowful, in each extreme.
Prior to entering the workforce (due to divorce), I was a stay at home wife and mother for eleven years. Those were some of the most fulfilling years of my life. No - they were THE most fulfilling years of my life, if I am going to be completely honest - till now. But the pressures of society, bad decisions on my part (starting with my completely voluntary and ridiculous choice of a mate and father of my children), and the subsequent divorce pushed me back into the workforce - where I fought and clawed and worked myself to the bone and up the corporate ladder. I had many professional successes along the way, and worked with some of the best companies and people in the US - but deep inside I grieved over what I had lost. I had lost my focus on my family and my home - while trying to maintain both.
This blog is not an indictment of feminism, or working moms, or 21st century Western society (well, OK, I may indict that from time to time!). But I want to encourage women and especially mothers of all ages to step back and carefully consider where they are, what their priorities are, and what the long term effects of their present day choices may be. My goal is to encourage men and women to strongly consider constructing their family life to allow the woman to stay home rather than work full time in the workplace.
In a nutshell, I want to encourage women to embrace this opportunity if it comes your way.
I begin this blog my first week at home full time, after twenty years of busting my rear - after twenty years of leaving the home and children that I loved every day to go spend the majority of my time with other people. For twenty years I gave my best to companies and people who, frankly, could have done without me and been just fine - while my family was forced to do without me. My family got what was left over at the end of every hectic day, and every crazy week.
Now - I will give them my best. They deserve nothing less.
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